Worst yet to come?

So, I’ve been doing this treatment since what..umm March 08 now…yeah this weekend and since last Wednesday have been the worst 5 days my body has endured yet. I could not move out of my bed without the help of my husband. This curse of herxing did not give me a little break til Sunday night, that is a couple hrs only, then came back severe again. My docotor had decided to decrease, take me off, and add new medicine’s to my regiman. Pulsing is what its called, along with my IV Recephon daily. This change due to bacterial infections that have been popping up now due to my body fighting the lyme.

Thats when I litterly felt by body dying wednesday night. Heart racing, head pounding, legs and all joints unable to move feeling like they were being weighed down by heavy ball and chains. Let alone getting a break from the inflamed feeling throught out them as well. It litterly felt like someone lit a match to my legs. I awoke every morning for the past three days with tremors, hot flashes, and severe neck pain and weakness. My poor husband had to drag me to the bathroom because I could not walk or even crawl to get to it myself. Then Sunday morning he awoke to hearing me cry because I had fallen out of my bed trying to get up. And they say there is no such thing as chronic lyme..then explain to me people why I’ve endured these symptoms since age 11 and they’ve only gotten worse by the year.

As I sit here writing this I wonder how so many of you lymies out there do it without the help of family or a spouse. I’m very independent when I’m sick as much as I can be, but this weekend I had to have someone there to make sure I could do the simplist of things. I couldln’t even shout out my husbands name when I fell cause I was so weak…how do you all do it? I thank god I have my family support every day. Then there are other times I wish they weren’t around to see this, its only more worry on their part. I commend all of these couragous sick or dying people that are ill who get through every day without a loved one’s support. I feel helpless and a alone, yet I’m not alone and feel guilty for even feeling this way let alone crying or whining about all this.

Will this nightmare called Lyme ever end?? Will I have children some day?? Will I live my dream of being married happily and having a family come true…I’m starting to have my doubts.

Sicker before better, I know thats how it is with this treatment. But how do you get through the sick part without wanting to give up? Is this sick part really ok, is it normal to feel like this? Am I getting to the end of this treatment or is this just bringing out more horrible things that have been sitting in my body from this virus for over 20yrs? Who knows…only the lord above does.

5 Responses

  1. I just found your blog today. I’ll be sure to return. I also have a Lyme Blog.

  2. First blog I read after wakeup from sleep today!

    —————————-

  3. You have an awesome blog Ashley! I enjoyed reading as much as I could. I also just created a Lyme website http://www.lymediseasecureplease.com if yo want to check it out.

  4. Thank you for your blog. Fyi, I have a friend who has been battling Lyme fir 17 years. And it has been a battle.

    My understanding is the antibiotics don’t get rid of it if it buried into cartilage.

    My friend was attacked by killer bees. At which point, she noticed the Lyme fog left. She researched and found be venom destroys the spirochettes. So now she has been getting bee stings and living a more normal live.

    I know there are many false tales out there about Lyme. I have witnessed the transformation. So.I believe. She use to have pauses in her speech.. and even in her walk… No more.

    I only share as I wish you well.
    Tom

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s

Follow

Get every new post delivered to your Inbox.

Join 42 other followers

%d bloggers like this: